Men, if you don’t already have women chasing after you every day, then you should be dating women online. Here are the Four most compelling reasons why men should be seeking out and meeting women online, and one reason why they absolutely shouldn’t.

1) Online dating is the most amazing gift to men invented since woman herself. (Well, most women.)

Think about it for a moment. For one small flat fee (and sometimes for no fee at all) you can scope out women, learn what they like, what they don’t like, check out their picture and actually begin swapping emails, IMs and talking with them.

Here’s what you don’t have: To get dressed up; to gas up your car; to spend hours of your prime time; to buy drinks for people you don’t’ know; to fail in public.

On balance, it’s a pretty convenient and effective method of meeting women.

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There are untold riches in the form of female companionship waiting for you online if only you’ll change one thought regarding how you’ll find success there.

Most men have this idea that they are “winning” when they take a woman to bed. Somehow, they’ve won the prize.

Think about how this works in your own mind. What are your own thoughts about winning the lottery? One in a million? Worse?

How often have you actually won a prize in a contest or drawing? Not many, I’d assume.

And so, if you think of “getting a woman” or even “getting a date” as the prize, your mind will automatically cause you to play in the same defeatist, resigned way you look at a contest.

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Marilee, a client of mine, was commitment phobic. “I’d love to be in a loving relationship,” she told me in one of our counseling sessions, “but I’m not willing to give up my freedom. I have a great life. I love my work and my friends. I love to travel and take workshops and classes. I don’t want anyone telling me what I can or can’t do. I don’t want to deal with someone feeling hurt because I want to work rather than be with him. It’s just not worth all the hassle.”

Marcus, another of my clients, was also commitment phobic. “When I’m not in a relationship, that’s all I can think about it. I really want someone to play with, to love and to grow with. But soon after getting into a relationship, I start to feel trapped. I feel like I can’t do what I want to do and I start to resent the person for limiting me. Most of the time, she has no idea what’s going on and is stunned by the break-up. She thought everything was fine. After leaving her, I’m back to square one – wanting to be in a relationship. This has happened over and over again.”

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Are you dating online and not meeting the women you crave and would like to meet?

I know what you are going through and it can be a lonely place when you aren’t getting the results you desire. In this situation you have to hang in there and never give up!

Tip #1

Test your replies from what you write in your first and second emails. Save your emails in a file and use the ones that get the most replies as templates…everyone is unique though.

Tip#2

You must comment on personal things she has written in her profile. To show you have made the effort to find out something about her.

And remember, nothing works 100% of the time.

I still scratch my head when a profile ignores my interest…and I match her criteria well…go figure.

I’ve just finished dating a lady and am back in the internet dating game…

And loving it…one thing about using online dating sites is that whenever you find yourself single, you can be comfortable in the knowledge that it is only a matter of time before you meet someone else.

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In my private practice for over 14 years no matter what my clients have come to see me about, there has always been an issue about a better relationship.

Here are 7 of the most common misconceptions my clients have related to me about having a better relationship. These misconceptions are followed by my perspective on each one of them.

Myth 1 I have to love everything about my partner

Reality Check 1

You were born pure and pristine. You then learnt behaviors from your parents, teacher, coaches, church etc. (who did their best to teach you about a better relationship). These behaviors have become the backbone for your way of living and having a better relationship.

Perhaps a common behavior that irritates having a better relationship would be leaving the toilet seat up after use. This is merely a behavior and not the essence of the person. However, when you may consider this behavior to be the person, this destroys the concept of a better relationship, creating all kinds of conflict in your need for a better relationship.

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