I asked Dave how he was doing since it was the anniversary of his wife’s death. He replied, “It’s rough, but what is even worse, is women won’t leave me alone! I don’t want to hurt their feelings, but they phone me too so I can’t even have peace in my own home.”

Dave is encountering desperate women who feel they must have a man in their lives to be complete. Their obvious need is what drives the men away, the opposite of their intent.

You react to people based on how you perceive them. These perceptions are influenced by your perceptual styles: Audio, Visual, Feeler, and Wholistic. Further, when you are desperate, this clouds your perceptions because you see what you want to see. “I just know I’m perfect for him” or “I know he’s interested in me.” You lose your objectivity.

Desperation makes you reactive, causing your hot button to be easily pushed. Your hot button stimulates an emotion out-of-control, which is fueled by fears.

When people of the Audio perception are reactive, there is an undercurrent of anger waiting to vent. Maintaining personal control is important for them. “Get out of my way, he’s mine!” There are basic fears for each perceptual style. For Audios, they are:

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Women around the world know what a “bootie call” is, some of us have been in the predicament and the rest of us only hear the sad stories of those who have been sucked into world of bootie-calls only to be heart broken. What most of us don’t hear about is how to avoid the entire bootie-call situation to begin with and that’s what you’ll learn to do in this detailed article…that’s not for the faint of heart!

A dear friend of mine, I wont mention names because she knows who she is suffered a great deal and it was all thanks to the bootie-call syndrome.

Yes, there is such a thing as a bootie-call syndrome, it’s a disease with symptoms and treatments, so it deserves no lesser of a name.

Allow me to set the scene to explain what happened to my friend, pay attention because it could happen to you.

After a string of miserably failed relationships basically due to just bad boyfriends my single friend fell into a state of depression. She felt that she would never find that perfect companion, there was no one on this earth intended for her, she felt worthless, unattractive and after a couple of years living the single life, she was tired of being alone.

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Have you ever fallen in love with two different persons at the same time? Falling in love with two different persons whom both have the same feeling for you too? Well, there is actually nothing wrong with that. In fact I would say that it is something very normal, sometimes even falling for more than two persons for some.

We are afterall human beings, creatures of great emotions. It is just natural for one to develop a liking for the opposite sex, especially when the both are getting along very well. Sometimes, it is just so hard for us to control our feeling and nevertheless, it has always been human nature to be greedy. It is always good to be able to have the best of both worlds isn’t it? But well, things are usually just not possible. At the end of the day, you just have to make your choice, to decide for yourself, your one and only love whom that person to be.

To love or not to love, it is your choice. Think of it this way. In our path of life, we are always faced with choices. Choices that we have to make decisions over; decisions that will affect our life. At circumstances, even having to make immediate decision on the spot, decisions concerning of life and death. Sometimes we made the right decision and sometimes the wrong. But no matter what our decisions might have brought so far; we accepted them, didn’t we?

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I find this dilemma rather common for younger couples, probably mid or late 30s and younger.

Usually one reports, “falling out of love” and is truly disturbed by this shift. He/she (and this is not merely a female problem!) wants to “recapture” those feelings.

This person has found a “significant other” who has stirred those dormant feelings and this person once again “feels in love.”

They are determined not to “settle” for a less than an ideal relationship, which means, of course, feeling the love feelings.

Here are some Key Points for this kind of affair. (The 6 others are outlined in my E-book.)

1. Unfortunately, our culture (movies, songs, romance novels, soap operas, romance comedies) teaches us that this is how it’s supposed to be. “Falling in love” is the norm – the implication being, that if it doesn’t happen, or if it goes away, something is wrong – with you, your spouse or the marriage. A good relationship must first unlearn a great deal.

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One kind of extramarital affair revolves around sexual addiction. The partner involved in the affair, plain and simple, has a difficult time saying “NO.” He/she may want to, but feels compelled to say “yes.”

People can’t say no? Well, I believe we all have the capacity, at some level, to say no. However, not all have developed that capacity or reached that level to firmly say no and mean it.

Some are “stuck” and seem to lack the ability to consistently act on the “no.” Please remember that all of us are “grabbed” by something and find it difficult to let go. Infidelity when connected to sexual addiction and its many forms, however, becomes a powerful focal point.

How to know if infidelity is attached to sexual addiction:

1. Sex takes on an inflated role or value. Sex, sexual conquest, sexual release becomes a powerful force. Acting on the sexual impulse is a frequent activity. Thinking about sex likewise consumes an inordinate amount of time. Multiple ways of acting out sexually (porn, strip clubs, multiple sex partners, etc.) are common.

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