Separations are painfull. This is a fact.

Unless you are cold and callous, the loss of a loved one is a numbing experience. In these situations, we tend to retreat into a corner and mope.

That is after the crying is done.

Crying may be the best thing you can do for now. You need time, time to cope with the situation, time to heal if you will. Don’t deny yourself this period of “mourning’ for want of a better word.

You are not a machine, small steps in the right direction are much more important now than trying to force the issue. Any hardnosed activity at this time, may result in more deeprooted problems which may surface later on in life. Try and heal through the situation, and give yourself a break.

What is the best way to cope?

Well that depends to a large extent on the type of person you are.

Some immerse themselves in their work, others just stay at home and mope. Then there are those of us that go to extremes. We binge on things that we normally don’t consider as usefull. Either food, drink, or in some cases sex with strangers.

These are normally not good remedies for the situation, as they seem to reinforce the feeling of loss of control. As such, they are not a coping mechanism, but a distraction mechanism.

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Often we hear people talk about searching for their soul mate. Looking for a match made in heaven. And other such statements.

Is this possible. Is there any truth to these statements?

We all know that different religions have different takes on the above, so I will try and avoid making any judgement calls in this area. As a matter of fact, let me state that in the context of this article, that I am not equating Spirituality with religion in any way whatsoever.

I merely exploring the attraction of partners beyond the normal physical and emotional norms we normally associate with relationships.

Could it be possible, that two people are attracted to one another due to some type of cosmic alignment? Let me explain what I mean. First we need to accept that there are universal laws governing our existence in this universe. These are undeniable. Consider the law of gravity. It affects you, whether you believe in it or not. This is a universal law!

If you now consider that the law of gravity is merely a law of attraction of two “bodies” of similar properties,this opens up a whole new understanding In this case bodies of matter. Would it be so inconceivable to accept the existence of this law of attraction between two “bodies” of similar matter in the “spiritual” or energetic realm? Let’s call them “souls” for want of a better term at this stage. Is it not feasible that attraction between similar entities could be a valid observation.

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The uncertainty of your partners fidelity can literally ruin your life.

If you are a commited member of a partnership, the suspicion, that your partner may not be as commited or even straying, can weigh heavily on your mind.

Thoughts of what they may be doing right now,scream across your consciousness all the time. You can’t focus on your work, or any other activity. Like a cancer destroying your body, these thoughts, are destroying your mind.

Chinese water torture would be a relief compared to what you are going through. You need to stop it- right now.

Do whatever you need to do, to preserve your sanity. Think about how you want to handle the situation, when you confront yor partner. Keep your cool. If emotions get to take over, you may say things, or do something that is stupid and that you will regret later.

You might decide to gather proof first. Look out for telltale signs, changes in behavior, change in shedule etc. A sudden loss of sexual appetite with you, should send off warning bells.

If at all possible, try and get some help, to see you through this time. Friends or professional help is important. Get some information and facts about your options, and how to handle the situation.

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Find your perfect partner through abundance thinking.

The secret.

Here is the main secret to finding and keeping a good life companion. Astonishingly, it does not merely boil down to the measures you take, but the way you think.

Let me explain.

I remember a time in my life, in my early 30’s when I spent almost 2 years on my own. I used to get up in the morning, stroll out of my million dollar home, get into my Porsche and drive to my flourishing manufacturing business. In the afternoons, I went to fitness center on my way home, worked out, and was fit as a fiddle. At gym a lot of women glanced at me and were forthcoming. Nonetheless I never had a date for months on end.

Is there something wrong with this image? You bet!

You see, I had gotten out of a agonizing association, where I had been rejected by my spouse on a daily basis. So I started to think, that no-one would ever feel affection for me, and I was just not worth it. And that conviction came true in my life.

I just didn’t believe that there was anybody out there, interested in me, and I was right.

Ok was it since I was unattractive? Hardly, I had an athletes body, clear skin, was in shape and healthy, and although not a Robert Redford look alike, beyond average looking.

Was it because I was broke and destitute? No, I had a prosperous business that I owned, drove a Porsche and lived in a giant home on a hill.

So there was nothing physically, causing my quandary. It was all in my mind.

But hang around, it gets worse.

Therapy and reading plenty of books, actually got me to go and take some action, to finally get to meet some new people. Yep I did find somebody, guess how that worked out.

Deep down, I still had that limited conviction, that I was utterly fortunate to discover anyone at all that wanted to be with me. They sensed it like a shark smelling blood in the water. To state that I partnered up with a predator, would have been an understatement.

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Did you know that apart from financial problems, heck even with financial problems, the biggest threat to a happy relationship is a negative person. Lets face it, if nothing is ever good or positive, sooner or later either the other partner or the relationship itself will not be good enough.

That person will find the negative in any situation, including the relationship. They will find the faults with you, no matter how small. Now if that information was used in a positive way to enhance or “fix” a relationship, great! But the negative person will use this information, focus on it continuously and bring it up constantly. Eventually, there is nothing good that can be seen about being in the relationship anymore.

The next step is action.

The person seeing only negative things about the relationship, will start acting in a way to protect themselves from the impending pain. This is a genuine concern, as it is a very real feeling. One action will lead to another, until there is no more feeling of passion and contentment left. There is a feeling of apprehension and gloom. Nobody wants to live under those circumstances, and so the relationship declines until one or the other partner says ‘enough, I’m outta here’ End of relationship.

I knew a woman for several years once, who was never happy in any situation, was negative about people, her surroundings and always expected that future events would be the ones to make her happy. Whilst I was trying to be friends with her, because I enjoyed her company at different times, her increasingly negative attitude eventually made me want to avoid being around her. She would say, “I would be happy if I was married,” then when she got married she was negative about her husband. She didn’t like where she lived either, but when she moved, she was still unhappy. She was always looking for happiness outside of herself. In other people, other situations, other surroundings. She didn’t understand that true happiness conmes from within, not from outside influences.

Some of the happiest people I have seen were poor and ragged street children in Africa. They did not even have a home to go to, or knew where their next meal would come from. Yet they lived harmoniously, in happy relationships with their family and others. Money and surroundings did not affect their happiness. As long as they were alive, they were happy.

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