Many men today are confused as to how to attract and deal with women. Today our women are more beautiful (through natural selection and beautification), capable and empowered than at any point in history, and though this is a wonderful thing, it’s had many ramifications when it comes to relationships.

Countless guys including ‘great catches’ are frustrated as to how to deal with, attract and succeed with these desirable women. In fact many men are so frustrated that we now have 40 year old virgins. The major social dilemma that I see exists is this:

Men are wondering “what is wrong with the women (and why do they treat us like this)”? and women are wondering, “Where are all the real men?”

Guys want to be a nice guy and they will even do what society tells them to when it comes to dating and attracting women yet almost none of it works. In fact it usually repels women away or incites them to reluctantly partake in the free gifts they’re getting in exchange for their own time even though the women are bored, not really interested and definitely not attracted.

Societal ‘dating’ is a lot of presumptuous false expectations and ideals that cater to her social leanings and not what her heart truly desires (also because few of these men have ‘character’).

Despite what the experts say, it often ends up being what neither of them want (to appease arcane social norms) and the guy goes home with an emptier wallet and a good night hug and she’ll end up (having sex) with a jerk who she is biologically attracted to.

If he’s ‘lucky’ he can maybe this beautiful woman’s friend. “Let’s just be friends”…the kiss of death for him if he only wanted something else.

So in order for men to be more effective with dating they’re going to have to do some different things. And I’m not talking about becoming someone they’re not so they have to ’seduce’ women or act like a jerk, be a playboy or even to ‘give her some of her own medicine’.

Women are just wondering why that can’t find a man they are attracted to who actually IS healthy and stable.

First of all society promotes ‘courtship’ which is a socially derived function which worked great throughout modern history when people lived in the same communities and the focus was immediately on raising a family. Simply put, things changed.

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How do you get on with others? Are all people your brothers and sisters or do you despair of the whole human race? Whichever attitude is most like yours, you may agree that the way we get on with each other is one of the key factors in determining what kind of life we have.

The different types of intelligence Howard Gardner is a Harvard professor of psychology who has developed the theory of multiple intelligences - the idea that people can be smart in at least eight separate areas, rather than just in the traditional IQ-test way. Among the different types are physical intelligence, linguistic intelligence, musical intelligence and interpersonal intelligence - being the ability to get along with a wide range of people. This last type has been explored recently under the name ‘Emotional Intelligence’. Another kind is called intrapersonal intelligence - the ability to get along with yourself.

So many problems between people arise when one or both of them have a confused relationship with themselves that affects the way they see the world.

The perfect hostess

Think of someone you know who is a wonderful host or hostess: a person who gives great parties where everyone feels comfortable and at ease, someone who can break the ice, no matter how frosty it feels. Is it coincidence, or is it the way they go about planning and running their social events?

John D Rockefeller, the founder of Standard Oil, is on record as saying ‘I will pay more for the ability to deal with people than for any other skill’. He knew that business is built on relationships and he hired people who were great at developing them.

Feeling connected - the key to a happy life

What if you don’t run a corporation or give lavish parties? Are you excused the need to know how to get on with people? In my experience, a key to a happy life is making good relationships with others. There may be a few people who genuinely would rather be alone, but most of us feel much happier when we feel connected to people and can share things with them.

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Why does my husband always disagree? Why does my wife put my ideas down?

One of the most irritating aspects of life as a united couple is trying to convince your spouse when they take a Macho attitude. Wives say that when they want to suggest an idea to their spouse, or get an agreement that a problem needs to be fixed, they are often faced with denial and negative attitudes. Husbands report that when they want to try something new, their partners often reject their suggestion without proper consideration. And both men and women say that they resent tiptoeing around on eggshells to avoid getting their life partners angry.

Some people seem to be constantly negative or skeptical. How can you influence someone who always looks for the crack or the loophole in what you say? Doesn’t it seem unfair that it’s often with your life partner that you have the least credibility? What do you have to do to get taken seriously? It can be easier to just give up rather than spend time and energy trying to get people to listen.

When a person is running what we call a Macho Pattern, they operate as if they believe the following:

* They already know everything there is to know.

* They do not have any problems; they and everything connected with them are perfect.

* If there are problems, they are of someone else’s making.

* They are better, higher, more important, and more knowledgeable than anyone else.

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We all know that relationships can be difficult. One of the best methods we have for making every relationship less stressful and more enjoyable is to show a little patience. Patience has been defined as what we lack for the driver in front of us and demand from the driver behind us.

In truth, patience is nothing more than time.

Time before we say something: Think of a time when someone was not patient with you when you needed them to be. Think of how you felt. Think of how deeply you might have been hurt. The next time you find yourself losing patience with another, take a moment to remind yourself of how you felt when someone had no patience with you.

Time before moaning and groaning: Patience takes time, but no more time than the showing of anger; of stomping or yelling or whining or complaining. A little patience can often resolve a conflict that a loss of patience will only escalate.

Time to just let things run their course: Arnold H. Glasow said, “The key to everything is patience. You get a chicken by hatching an egg, not by smashing it.” Some things require a certain amount of time. Losing patience only hurts ourselves and won’t speed up the process.

So take the time to smile instead of frown; the time to wink instead of snarl. How much time does it really take to give someone a small nod or a pat on the back? We never stop to think about how a little of our time can make such a big difference in how we make another feel.

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A recent study is revealing the hard facts that one needs to know, in order to unlock the secrets of building a lasting love relationship. This study revealed that marriage is very predictable. It also developed a decision-making tool that anyone can use to choose their true lover (from the open range of millions of singles), and show you how-to keep her/him successfully.

This study interviewed over 1,000 experienced adults ranging between the ages of 26 and 80 years old. Among these interviewed adults were the successfully married, the unsuccessfully married, the adult singles who had quit looking for a lover, those who were still trying to find their mates, and a few who had completely changed their sexual behaviors to escape the deep pain that hit hard into their soul. This study revealed all the information that has been missing, and I will progressively be sharing this incredible wealth of know-how in the articles on your web page.

Let me tell you some of what I found. Out of more than 1,000 adults interviewed, 280 adults had failed in marriage. They had a lot of stories and experiences, and I will only share a few of the hard learned lessons they had in common. Note that: the aim of sharing this information here is to empower you to understand how they failed, why they failed, and how you can use their experiences to enable you to make winning decisions to brighten your future. Please, study these findings:

1. As at the time of tying the knot, each of those 280 adults believed that their marriage was going to last forever, but that did not happen! They all learned this hard lesson; that being good and wanting to be successfully married is not enough on its own, because the success of your marriage truly depends on your husband or your wife. They proved that you cannot sustain a love relationship single handedly; it takes two to succeed. And therefore, it is important that you choose a lover who is right for you, and also finds you right to them; and I will share with you how to do this in the next articles.

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