For the senior single, negotiating through the minefields of the dating scene can be scary. This need not be, as dating for seniors can be as much fun as any other age group. Plus mature dating brings forth a richness borne of maturity that’s largely lacking in the younger generation.

One big challenge faced by the older single is that of lack of avenues geared towards dating for seniors. Night clubs and singles bars are particularly designed with this age-group in mind.

Actually, lack of places to meet other seniors may not be problem. There are plenty of places for this. The problem is getting to meet compatible senior singles who are actively looking for a date.

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A broken heart is hard to deal with no matter how the break up goes down. It is something that may hurt for a long time to come.

You need to figure out how to get over a broken heart when it happens. It may not be something that you want to think about but you have to do it because life does go on and you need to take advantage of it.

There are going to be different phases of the breakup. You need to go through them all so that you are able to achieve the sense of security and love that you once did. Having these feelings are going to be good for you but you do not want to take them too far.

This will only make things harder on you when it comes to getting on with your life. There are predicable phases of a break up. You may have been through them before, but there are some good ways to deal with your strong feelings and get over that broken heart fast!

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I am writing you out of complete frustration. I am a divorced mother of an 11-year-old son and a businesswoman who has had good relationships with men over the years. I’ve never had trouble finding or keeping friends. I believe to have a friend you have to be a friend, you treat everybody correctly, and you stay away from troubled people.

There’s a man I’ve known over 25 years. We’ve seen each other through marriages and relationships. We talk on the phone for hours. However, after his second marriage failed four years ago, I believe he came out damaged. We had never been intimate, but two years ago I thought I would give it a try because I always found him attractive.

Well, I discovered that while he’s a great lover, he is narcissistic, a sadist, and completely devoid of concern for other people’s feelings. I am amazed I never knew this about him, but maybe I wasn’t interested in knowing. He claims he won’t have a relationship with me unless I am on his page and submissive to his wishes.

I am sad for him. He’s really changed. He’s exploiting what he knows about my nature for his own benefit. This relationship spells trouble, but I can’t seem to let go.

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The other day I was at the local gym in the midst of one of my all too-infrequent workouts when I spied one of those A+ little foxes that make you forget how much weight you just dialed into the machine. I reflected on how the gym represents a kind of “so-near-yet-so-far” deal when it comes to meeting women because while they may be right there prancing around covered in sexy sweat, the environment never really seems appropriate for meeting and flirting around as it does in a nightclub. People are in a different frame of mind at the gym and often broadcast a variety of non-verbal “stay away” signals that only the boldest dare challenge.

However, after a little experimentation and some intense pondering I think I may have identified a few nuggets hiding amidst this apparent wasteland, such as:

1) If they are locked-up in their own little i-pod universe, they are most likely out of reach as far as a DIRECT approach is concerned. I-pods and portable radios are by far the biggest obstacle to socializing in the gym. How do you break through to these chicks who are encapsulated in their own little world of sound and obviously trying to lock the rest of us out? You can try saying something clever to them, and if they see your lips moving will usually tear the headset off and ask “what?”, but their annoyance at having to do so is apparent and this immediate negative posture is not easy to overcome.

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Enlightened relationships fulfill all aspects of our lives. We trust each other and we feel we are on the same team so we like to help each other. There is a deep sense of belonging. We discuss important issues together. We laugh together. We love to express our sensuality freely, with enthusiasm and a sense of discovery. We feel powerful enough to be vulnerable in each other’s presence. We communicate with honesty and openness from our authentic selves. We are nurturing a seed of love that blooms into a flower that expands its essence to our surroundings. As we love, we feel a connection that goes beyond our bodies. We start sensing that we are more than our body and become conscious of the divine connection. We want to live fully and contribute to life.

In other words life together is safe, sexy, powerful, loving, expressive and expanding beyond our bodies.

However, not all relationships have to fulfill all the areas mentioned above. People can form a relationship such as marriage for all sorts of reasons. Some people marry for security, some because of sexual gratification, some because they feel more powerful together than separate, some because they can communicate well together, some for spiritual reasons. Enlightened relationships seem to have the entire gamut of reasons to be together.

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